Monday, December 17, 2007

So, Who Exactly Is The Hero Of This Movie?

Thursday night I did a favor for a friend who is currently without an automobile. I picked her up from her job as a server at a comedy club and allowed her to pay me for taxi service in beer and nachos while I watched the Thursday night NFL game at a local bar.

While waiting for our Chicken Nachos and while Jessica was out socializing with some of the other regulars the commercial for Tom Hanks’ movie “Charlie Wilson’s War” appeared on the TV. Needing something to keep my attention and being in a WiFi hotspot I pulled out my trusty iPhone and Googled Charlie Wison.

Asside: That may have been the single nerdiest statement ever made on this blog. Wait, here comes another.

When I landed on Charlie’s Wikipedia page (don’t say I didn’t warn you!) I did some quick reading and getting the bare minimum facts from the open-source encyclopedia I read of his playboy lifestyle and the various welfare state agenda items on his voting record.

Throughout the eighties, though, Congressman Charlie Wilson picked up a new cause: Afghanistan. With the Afghanis in a long war with the Russians, our cold war adversaries, Charlie Wilson on multiple occasions offered supplies, weapons and various military aid to the Afghanis in order to fight the cold war by proxy.

One thing that the article does not mention is who was leading the resistance against the Russians in those days. The Afghani leader’s name should be familiar to us all by now, Osamma Bin Ladin.

The most surprising thing about this is that Tom Hanks would get involved in another semi-controversial movie character so soon after the forgettable film rendition of The DaVinci Code. Of course to keep Hanks’ status as America’s favored son in Hollywood the part of Professor Langdon was rewritten to show him to be at least somewhat a person of faith.

Of course what sends my liberal-slant-spidey-sense tingling is the fact that activist and part time actress Julia Roberts is his co star in this film. Obviously Hanks is here to provide the film with some amount of acting credibility.

Much like the Wikipedia article the movie could be done glorifying the noble efforts of a liberal Texas Congressman turning from a playboy to a Cold Warrior without mentioning exactly WHO was receiving his aid.

Representative Wilson died in 1996 and thus never saw the extent to which his cause had gone awry. Still upon seeing this movie one should remember who it is “Good Time Charlie” was really helping back then.


Thursday, December 13, 2007

In the news…

It’s been a while since I’ve done one of these so I thought I’d tackle a few issues.

First up, Madonna in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame.

Singer Madonna will be inducted into the US Rock and Roll Hall of Fame next
year, it has been announced.

John Mellencamp, The Ventures,
Leonard Cohen and The Dave Clark Five, will also be honoured at a ceremony next
month in New York.
I guess this just proves that controversy throughout your career by rolling around on the ground in your underwear is an acceptable substitute for talent.

As Baseball Braces for Report, Pettitte and Clemens Cited

A former trainer for Roger Clemens provided information about Clemens’s steroid use to investigators for former Senator George Mitchell, who will release a report Thursday on steroids in baseball, two lawyers familiar with the investigation said.

The trainer, Brian McNamee, also provided information about steroid use by pitcher Andy Pettitte and first baseman David Segui, the lawyers said. McNamee spoke to Mitchell’s investigators under pressure from federal prosecutors investigating the use of steroids in baseball.

Mitchell is to release his 304-page report, covering 20 months of investigation, Thursday afternoon. More than 50 players are named in the report, according to individuals who saw the report.
Now we’re talking about substances such as steroids, and Human Growth Hormone (HGH) commonly referred to as “performance enhancing substances”.

Why do we watch professional sports as opposed to other professions? The answer is to see enhanced performances. Nobody pays $17.50 to sit in a hard plastic chair to watch me at my job. Well even if I had a job they wouldn’t do that.

But how narrowly should we define performance enhancers? Tiger Woods openly endorses Lasik eye surgery. The result of his procedure has given him better than 20/20, or super human sight.

A first year pro on the PGA Tour probably hasn’t earned enough prize money or endorsements to have the discretionary funds to get this procedure. This gives Tiger Woods performance-enhancing advantage over the rookie.

What do you get if you take the steroids out of Major League Baseball? You get Minor League Baseball. People won’t show up to see the league’s best home run hitter struggle to get to 30 runs in a season.

Even if every player in Major League Baseball did take steroids there is one part of baseball that no amount of performance enhancing drugs will enhance the performance of. That part is hitting a five-inch spheroid with a four-inch diameter cylinder. That only comes from raw talent amplified by years of practice.

Former Senator George Michell and his report will attempt to get congress to do something substantial about professionals doing anything they can to excel at their profession, while ignoring other issues such as illegal immigration, terrorism, taxes, inflation and dependence on foreign oil.

Thank you very much, Senator Michell, you've compromised the security of the country!

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

What I DON'T Want For Christmas

I've come to believe that the worst christmas gift you can get is any christmas decoration. I put up my tree yesterday and when I decided to add to festivities I looked in my closet and found the following 3 items:
  • a dog that barks christmas carols
  • 2 snow men that sing "Baby it's cold out side"
  • and a penguin that dances and sings to an overly upbeat version of "Jingle Bells"
All 3 of these were Christmas present and aside from the singing dog that used to upset our real dog who thought another dog had invaded her house, none of them get used more than a week a year.

So what's the point of giving someone a Christmas decoration when most people decorate BEFORE christmas and take things down by new years? it's like saying "Here's a gift that you can use for the next week and then not for another year." You know what's a better gift than this?

  • Underwear
  • Socks
  • A spatula
  • The complete DVD Box Set of 227
  • A gift card for a brazilian wax